'There is a good way to breakup with someone and it doesn’t include a post-it'. Carrie, Sex and the City
I'm sure we have all watched that episode of Sex and the City, well for those of you who haven't, the man Carrie is in love with at the time Jack Berger, breaks up with Carrie, on a POST- IT ! Yup, those yellow little sticky papers! 'I'm sorry- I can't- Don't hate me !' - Aaah the nerve ! I remember thinking, after watching that episode for the 5th time !
It then made me wonder...is there a NICE way to break up with someone...to break someone's heart? The answer my friends, is no, in fact there is not. There will always be one person in the situation who is effected on a deeper or more intense level. Because one person is always more invested in the relationship and has expectations that are being let down/crushed/walked over/trampled upon/ smashed into pieces... or however you wish to term it ! The 2 key people involved in the break up process are the 'Breakie' or the person initiating the break-up , and the 'Broken', the person having his or her heart torn to shreds. Well lets focus on the Broken.
For the Broken, its important to remember that when it comes to a break up, both men and women tend to act impulsively and selfishly, trying to safe-guard themselves. However it is important not to get carried away by any sudden flow of emotion or to be blinded and speak and behave in a way that compromises your self esteem and dignity . Vent to your friends, that is what they are there for, you would do the same for them ! Do things that you enjoy, you are no longer a 'we' , but a strong and independent 'I'. So focus on yourself and your needs, its all about feeling comfortable in your own skin again. Go to the Spa, a shopping spree, go crazy!Watch John Tuker must die and have a cupcake... for goodness sake have two! Get a puppy or a new car , something to show off and take your mind off the pain and distress you are in. Lastly, but most importantly, bare one thing in mind......time is a healer! We have the ability to change our lives, to take control, to heal the pain. So chin up, big smiles.... go on have a cupcake ;)
I'm sure we have all watched that episode of Sex and the City, well for those of you who haven't, the man Carrie is in love with at the time Jack Berger, breaks up with Carrie, on a POST- IT ! Yup, those yellow little sticky papers! 'I'm sorry- I can't- Don't hate me !' - Aaah the nerve ! I remember thinking, after watching that episode for the 5th time !
For the Broken, its important to remember that when it comes to a break up, both men and women tend to act impulsively and selfishly, trying to safe-guard themselves. However it is important not to get carried away by any sudden flow of emotion or to be blinded and speak and behave in a way that compromises your self esteem and dignity . Vent to your friends, that is what they are there for, you would do the same for them ! Do things that you enjoy, you are no longer a 'we' , but a strong and independent 'I'. So focus on yourself and your needs, its all about feeling comfortable in your own skin again. Go to the Spa, a shopping spree, go crazy!Watch John Tuker must die and have a cupcake... for goodness sake have two! Get a puppy or a new car , something to show off and take your mind off the pain and distress you are in. Lastly, but most importantly, bare one thing in mind......time is a healer! We have the ability to change our lives, to take control, to heal the pain. So chin up, big smiles.... go on have a cupcake ;)
